As I’ve been studying God’s Word, I have found that our English translation seems inadequate to me to get what the writers of the original text meant to say; especially the words used where we are to ascertain God’s character and how we are to meet with Him. The words like wrath, vengeance, hate, anger, fear, etc used to give us a picture of God; I believe they are sending us the wrong impression of Him.
Why do you think that when Yeshua (Jesus), God’s Son, was
here on earth with us that He referred to God as Father; Matthew
23:9 “Do not call anyone on earth your father; for One is your
Father, He who is in heaven.” In the Gentile “Old Testament” (Jewish or Hebrew
Bible “Torah”), God is also referred to as “Father” Malachi
2:10 Yeshayahu-
Isaiah 64:7.
There is great confusion also as to who are God’s children and
again, there is reason for us to be confused because of the wording used in our
English translations. Personally, I believe we all are His children because of
scriptures like Malachi 2:10, Isaiah 64:7, and Matthew 23:9. I believe I have
personally verified this in my life. Father God has helped me through many
difficult situations and I feel I can be at peace or rest in His care.
This is something I want to go deeper into my future studies;
go back into the Greek and Hebrew words. I don’t actually know how to read
those two languages but there are good Greek to English and Hebrew to English
books which have helped me tremendously; I use the “Ultimate Bible Study Suite”
on my Kindle a lot but also go on-line too. I have found that a Greek word or
Hebrew word has different meanings too, just as our English words do. When you
think about it, it’s no wonder why we get confused sometimes; when our English
translations came from most often a Greek translation which originally came
from a Hebrew translation. To make matters worse, from what I now understand,
is that in the Hebrew culture, the old manuscripts (very painstakingly) were
re-written onto new scrolls or books and then once verified that the new
matched the old, they would destroy the old.
When I look at God, The Creator of all things visible and invisible, as being my Father, I believe I get a much clearer picture of Him; He loves all His children, He’s someone who is kind and gentile, judges justly, and knows how to punish correctly to bring about a good character. He is someone I want to honor and respect and not do anything to bring dishonor to His name. But I know that if I do, I will receive fair and just punishment.
I believe that because we have misconceptions about God, we also see other things wrongly. One thing in particular is our concept of hell. I have already talked about this in previous posts but I want to bring this up again because I believe our false view of it is what’s turning so many people away from our loving Father.
I believe hell is great grief and sorrow that we experience from shame. Believe me, I have experienced it and it is not something you want to go through. This was something that brought about a change in me, just what Father hoped for (maybe I should say, knew would happen) in punishing His child. Don’t you think that Father God knows how best to do this; not like our earthly fathers?
I think it is time to tell you what happened in my past life. It is something I don’t like to talk about but I think it is needed for you to understand what I believe hell really is.
I was brought up in the Lutheran faith. My parents brought me to church regularly. I went through all the requirements of the faith; baptized as an infant, went through catechism, when I became of age, celebrated communion, attended church and Sunday school regularly, tithed, did pretty much everything needed to be a good person; or at least what I thought back then.
I viewed sin as having different degrees of badness, not a good word but you know what I mean. On a level of 1 to 10 where 1 is not that bad and 10 being really bad, I thought that steeling a piece of candy was about a 1 but steeling millions of dollars was a 10. Killing someone of course was a 10. Cursing was pretty high on my list, about an 8, smoking was about a 5, drinking was maybe a little higher, about a 6. Anyway, you can see that the badness of sins was all in how I judged them to be.
In my early years, I didn’t curse, drink, smoke, rob a bank, have physical sex with anyone, and I was going to say tell big lies but as I said in my post, “Shame”, I did tell a big lie then which has haunted me until only recently, when I finally confessed to those I lied to.
I did do a lot of things that I thought just came with the age; call other people names, tried in the usual ways to get what I wanted, occasionally disobeyed my parents… One thing I think was and still is my biggest problem is that I like to see the nakedness of women. Even though I didn’t actually have physical sex with them until in the military service, I had mental sex with them, I masturbated. I don’t know if this problem I experience is more or less than any other boy or man. I wonder if men have this desire, do women also? I understand all too well why the Bible and the Quran instructs both men and women to dress modestly. I will steal a look when a woman is not dressed well; although now, with the help of my Lord, I more quickly turn my eyes away.
When I was about 17 years old, a cousin, who was of a different faith, invited me to a Campus Crusade for Christ function for young adults. They explained that we are all sinners and that we needed to repent, and ask Jesus Christ to be “Lord and Savior”. After the function, my cousin and I talked and I invited Jesus into my life as “Lord and Savior”; I don’t remember if repentance was part of this.
Well, the Vietnam War was going on, I was nearing the end of schooling for computer programming when I got my draft notice. I went down to talk with an Army recruiter to see what my chances were of getting into computer programming if I enlisted for 4 years instead of being drafted for 2. After assuring me that my chances were very good (I forgive you), I went ahead and enlisted thinking this might keep me from going to
I finished basic training and went into a room where we had 4 choices to make for our AIT(Advanced Infantry Training.) The guy there to give us our instructions, right away said, “All you who want computer programming, you can sign up for it but you are not going to get it.” Well, there went that hope right out the window. I picked 4 things, none of which I got; was actually a good thing as one of them was a lineman; one who climbs up telephone poles (makes for a pretty easy target). I ended up becoming a mores code operator and went to
While in the service, I took up doing just about everything one could; someone who I would have look down on before accepting Jesus as “Lord and Savior”. I drank, smoked, cursed, had paid-for-sex with two women (forgive me), had pin-up calendars, Playboy magazines, watched porn movies, masturbated, played with Ouija boards…
My service time ended and I quietly returned home and tried to blend into the working force. I was living in an apartment by myself and was looking for friendship, from the opposite sex mostly but became a friend with someone of the same sex; at least I thought he was my friend. He invited me to go with him to a bar. I thought maybe it would either be a regular bar or a nude bar, like what I had visited before. It ended up being a gay bar; I didn’t understand this until going inside. I could have turned right around and gone home but I didn’t. I was given a few drinks and passed out. When I somewhat came to, we were entering my apartment where he had his way with me (I forgive you). I didn't even try to stop him. He left and I cried bitterly (not because of him leaving) but because of seeing the shameful person I had become (Matthew 26:75)?
I wondered about when I asked Jesus to be my “Lord and Savior”; did I not mean it or why didn’t He save me from getting to this point. I didn’t understand and I kept crying with what could be described as gnashing of teeth I kept talking with God and asking why.
I sure new then that I was a sinner and even though I didn’t understand what happened the first time, I decided to ask Jesus Christ back into my life (and help me become that better person I wanted to become and who I thought would be more pleasing to God. (After re-reading this, maybe this is where I am going wrong. This requires more thought and talks with Father.))
After asking Jesus back into my life, because I didn’t know what happened the first time and if this time was different, I asked God to turn off and turn back on a lamp that I was sitting next to. At that very moment, the lamp blinked. It surprised me so much that it took me some time to grasp what just happened. I started laughing and felt that God was laughing with me. I even joked with Him saying something like, “I was really wanting You to turn the light all the way off and then back on again.” Funny, God knew just what I needed to cheer me up.
My life changed after that point. I started going to a good Christian church where I became friends with just the right people I needed to grow in Christ. It was here I met my wonderful wife (I did tell her about my past before marriage and she accepted me anyway.) We reared two wonderful girls in this church.
I wished I could say that this good life stayed that way but I can’t. That wonderful church split apart with most of the people building a new church elsewhere. My wife and I decided to stay in the same area of the old church and found a Baptist church we liked and joined.
I was a deacon of the church for a number of years. I was later asked to become an elder. I accepted, without getting a clear answer from the Lord. As an elder, I saw the business side of church which I didn't like. After a majority vote of the elders and a majority vote of the church members we paid a company to teach us how to raise money to build a bigger sanctuary. This didn’t seem right to me and I decided to leave. I came up with some other than this reason for wanting to leave.
By this time, my wife had already stopped going to church. We where now living close to the church that was created by most of the members of the first church and I decided to try there. After trying this for a while, I just felt like this was not the place either for me and I became disillusioned with church altogether and quit going.
I began seeing myself falling back into my old ways; I was starting to have sex with make-believe women in my mind; masturbating. At first, I thought that as long as this make-believe woman was my wife, maybe it would be OK with God. As time went on, I modified my wife’s body and imagined having sex in inappropriate ways. Then it didn’t matter what the head looked like; I was just interested in the other parts. This is a case in point why it is so important to ask Father God to get rid of wrong thoughts as soon as you get them in you mind; what Jesus' model prayer is asking Father God for "...lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil..." Also, do not think you can conceal anything from Father God by hiding it in your heart and mind Ezekiel 11:5, Matthew 9:4. Father God sees those thoughts just as fast as they enter your head and He is the only one who can help you get rid of them before they become actions that you will some day feel shame for.
Father God had to discipline me. One day, I was by myself at our weekend property. My wife had gone out of town on business. It was the perfect opportunity to masturbate. Latter on that evening, I was trying to go to sleep when I started having severe chest pains. I was already feeling that I was doing evil in the sight of the Lord before the chest pains but this culminated knowing it. I wept bitterly again for becoming this person who I even detested. I talked with Father God and told Him that He had every right to take me; that I should die. I don’t remember all our conversation, but I didn’t die and this was enough to get me back on the right path again.
I knew I needed church so searched for one that I felt I fit into and whose people could help me stay in Christ. I mentioned a church in one of my earlier posts where I thought was the right one for me but Father God had other plans for me.
I told you about the vision or experience I had were I ended up in a kind of hell and how this has caused me to scour God’s word for answers as to what happens to all of us who are not chosen.
As I look back on my life, I see that God has prepared me every step of my life for a work He wishes to accomplish. Some people will say that God does not use people, and maybe that’s not quite what He does; maybe it’s that He orchestrates all these things we believe to be bad into something good. I am happy when God includes me in His work. I never know how it will turn out, but I love watching Him work. It always amazes me when I get to see some of the things He accomplishes.
You know how it is in this life when you find a new job and you imagine all the good things that will come out of it and that you will be a part of it. It rarely if ever turns out the way you imagined; it’s usually much worse. Well, when you are involved in God’s work, it too never turns out the way you imagined; it’s always much better.
Let me get back to hell; why I believe our thoughts about it, because of what we have always been told, is wrong. I told you my life’s story or at least the most important parts; hoping you would understand what hell really is on your own. In case you still can’t see or can’t believe that grief and sorrow are that hell talked about in the Bible, let me explain.
When you finally see that ugly person (internal condition) you really are when Father God lifts the veil from all of us, how are you going to feel? When a person is going through grief, don’t we sometimes say of that person that they are eaten up with grief; the Bible says, “… where their worm never dies.” Everything that the Bible describes hell as being, haven’t we also said this about grief and sorrow? We even say this about Jesus Christ, the Messiah, “A man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief;” Isaiah 53:3.
GRIEF:
Synonyms
Related Words
agony, distress, pain, suffering, torment; blue devils, blues, dejection, depression, desolateness,desolation, despair, despondence, despondency, disconsolateness,dispiritedness,distress, doldrums, downheartedness,dreariness, dumps, forlornness, gloom, gloominess, glumness, heartsickness,joylessness,melancholy, miserableness,misery, mopes, oppression, sorrowfulness,unhappiness,woefulness, wretchedness;contrition, guilt, regret, remorse, rue, self-reproach,shame; melancholia, self-pity
SORROW:
Synonyms
Related Words
agony, distress, pain, suffering, torment; blue devils, blues, dejection, depression, desolateness,desolation, despair, despondence, despondency, disconsolateness,dispiritedness,distress, doldrums, downheartedness,dreariness, dumps, forlornness, gloom, gloominess, glumness, heartsickness,joylessness,melancholy, miserableness,misery, mopes, oppression, sorrowfulness,unhappiness,woefulness, wretchedness;contrition, guilt, regret, remorse, rue, self-reproach,shame; melancholia, self-pity
First Known Use of SORROW
before 12th century
Related to SORROW
Synonyms
Related Words
ache, long (for), pine (away), sigh, smart; rack, torment, torture; bemoan, bewail, deplore, lament, rue; bawl, blubber, cry, groan, howl, keen, moan, sob, take on, wail, weep, yammer, yowl; languish; regret
You have to remember that if you have to deal with this grief and sorrow in the next life, there is no longer death to escape to. I don’t know this for sure but I somehow believe that Father God and/or Jesus will be helping us in this too. This is the reason why I believe that all of us will GLADLY bow to Jesus. Psalm 110:3 Romans 14:11
I came across the following book, Tzefaniah, from the “Torah”, (Zephaniah in the Old Testament) which I believe says in a Hebrew way, what I’ve been trying to say:
Tzefaniah - Zephaniah - Chapter 1
Tzefaniah - Zephaniah - Chapter 2
Tzefaniah - Zephaniah - Chapter 3
Now there is the part about hell being everlasting; we’ve all heard this.
There are many references in the Bible of something being everlasting but it can’t possibly mean what we think of as everlasting; that thing talked about as being everlasting would still be that way today but it is not. (I was going to list the many references but I think instead I will point you to a very good book called “Hope Beyond Hell The Righteous Purpose of God’s Judgment” by D. Scott Reichard, Gerry Beauchemin. God directed my path to this book a while back, when I most needed it and even though it has helped me tremendously, I still had to find out these truths on my own.)
Don’t we have many words in our English language where the same word, spelled the same, mean two totally different things; for example lie and lie. One means to recline and the other means to make a false statement. Other languages do too.
I could go on to argue my point but let me just ask you something. Which hell would you expect comes from our Loving Father; a punishment that we justly deserve or putting us into some kind of cavernous place for making the wrong choice and then throw away the key; which brings me to another point? Why is there a key if you can never get out? What is the need of it?
I think I will just close with this:
1
Timothy 2:3-6
Complete Jewish Bible (CJB)
3 This is what God, our Deliverer, regards as good; this is what meets his approval.
4 He wants all humanity to be delivered and come to full knowledge of the truth. 5 For God is one;[a] and there is but one Mediator between God and humanity, Yeshua the Messiah, himself human, 6 who gave himself as a ransom on behalf of all, thus providing testimony to God’s purpose at just the right time.
Ephesians
1:9-11
New Century Version (NCV)
9 let us know his secret purpose. This was what God wanted, and he planned to do it through Christ. 10 His goal was to carry out his plan, when the right time came, that all things in heaven and on earth would be joined together in Christ as the head.
11 In Christ we were chosen to be God’s people, because from the very beginning God had decided this in keeping with his plan. And he is the One who makes everything agree with what he decides and wants.
I know that God is the only one, who can give understanding, so if you see now, then praise God!
PS: My command of the English language is not good and I invariably choose the wrong word. I hope you will understand what I meant to say anyway. Like I said, English seems inadequate to me, especially using it to translate God's word and to describe this wonderful loving Father God we have. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lord Jesus for making it possible to get to know Father.
